Finishing on a high note: 2019 and Zwift’s Tour of London

I went all-out on my last ride.

I wanted to see what I was made of. I’ve always pushed myself, but seldom have I pushed myself past the point where I wanted to give up.

I got to that point at last year’s Ride for Sight, a century on roads to the middle of nowhere. With nobody to ride with, it was solitary, scary and – well, kind of boring. The last 20 miles were a struggle; I just wanted to finish. And I did, in just about 6 hours, my body broken, my knees and legs sore, my stomach oh so hungry for anything that wasn’t sugar.

I didn’t feel that way at the Triple Bypass. Sure, it was hard, but there was always someone there to cheer you on. Plenty of places to stop if you needed. Lots of people around to make sure you didn’t feel like you’d get stranded if something happened.

But this was different. This wasn’t a six hour ride. This was just over one hour. But it was a hard hour. It was a gritty hour. It was a sweat-pouring-into-your-eyes-and-oh-god-it-stings hour. We had two fans blowing, but it felt like they were barely working … though I imagine if they were off, it’d be pure torture.  

(On a hilarious side note about the fans, my dog Huxley is recovering from an upset stomach and was stinking up the room with his farts as he lay on the ground completely oblivious to our protests asking for him to leave the room. Thankfully this only lasted about 20 minutes until he did get up and move into the living room. OK, back to the ride.)

The fifth stage of Zwift’s Tour of London ended on a climb, several “miles” right up to the finish line on top of Keith Hill. I’m light, so climbing is pretty easy for me. This is where I always pass people. I managed to pass dozens on the way up into the sub-300 ranks. It wasn’t easy though. My heart rate average for the whole ride was 167 with a max of 180 right there at the end. Average watts: 175, or 3.3 w/kg.

According to my last ramp test, my FTP is 3.45 w/kg. 183. Wowza. I got pretty darn close to that.

In some ways, I feel like I could’ve given more. But I know my body is fatigued after this little tour, with Disaster Day lodged right in the middle. I need to do some easy recovery rides over the next week and let my muscles heal.

I want to race, though. I had so much fun. I am so competitive, and I’m always amazed at what I have left when it seems like everything was long gone. That’s what kept me going on the century, and that’s what kept my spark alive on that race when I thought I toasted my legs in the first 15 minutes.

As the year, and the decade, slowly whittles down, I am so happy to see all the positive changes I’ve made for myself, for my body, and for my future. Maybe it seems weird – or even quite a reach – but this ride was such a great representation of the last 10 years.

You don’t know what you’re made of until you test it. You don’t know if you like something until you try it. You don’t know if something works unless you give it a shot.

I am so grateful that I had the chance to test myself, gain new skills, make some huge changes in my life, -- I’m even thankful for the opportunity to make some big mistakes that were great learning experiences.

I’m going to push myself even farther in 2020. It’s going to be uncomfortable. It’s probably going to hurt a little bit. And, well, there’s no guarantee I’ll even accomplish what I set out to do.

All right, 2020 … let’s see what you got. I am so ready.